jengohshit | (no subject)

It honestly didn't occur to me that you'd sit there and open them together, or that you wouldn't be able to hide the contents if you wanted to. I mean, you're both fucking people, to some degree, without incident as far as I can tell, so you must have some ways of keeping secrets.

Mmm-hmm. Well, we do, but the Vax is outta this particular bag now.

Didn't know it was a secret. I'm not bothered by both of you knowing, anyway.

[ She sighs, slightly exasperated but mostly amused. ]

I did pretty much figure you two were doing it.

I mean, yeah. I'm not especially good at hiding it.

You hadn't let on to Caleb we were doing anything.

[ She doesn't say it like a judgment, just an observation. ]

Daddy.

[ All right, that's a tease, not an observation. ]

I dunno, never came up. [Fortunately, on voice, she can't see the way his face twitched.]

Yeah, not surprised.

[ A pause. ]

Can I -- hm. What ... are we doing, anyway?

What do you mean?

Like ... I don't know, I mean, this ... Daddy and Princess thing. The fake dick. The message sex at one in the morning. I like it a lot, I really -- [ a huffed breath, almost a wry laugh ] -- really do.

Is that, like ...

Is that as far as you wanna go?

Well, we tried going further and we hurt each other. [His tone is a bit gentle, not enough to feel condescending, but he doesn't want to sound flippant about it.] Has anything changed?

Yyyyyes? We talked each other off several times? I call you Daddy now?

And we talked about -- bodies.

Maybe I should've told you about that before the first time we tried to have sex, I know, but. You know it's, it's hard to talk about. To people. To anyone. Even friends.

Getting horny for each other wasn't the problem, though, was it? Is having talked about it gonna make you less nervous about it?

No, it wasn't, but ...

[ She's quiet for a long moment. She'd like to be honest with him, not just say what she knows is the "right" answer. ]

It helps. I know that -- that I'm not about to do something that'll freak you out. And you're not going to do anything I don't like, I knew that already.

[He takes a second to mull that over, roll it around in his head.] All right. That's good.

I think what I need reassurance of is that you're gonna be able to get through whatever we do without having to drink more or do anything else really panicky in the middle. Nerves are fine, having a drink before is fine, but...there's a point I can't push past.

Hm. [ Thoughtful, frowning. ] Define "panicky."

I'm not sure I have a really good definition for it. It's not a super hard line, I don't think. Hesitating or taking a breath would be okay but flinching away would probably make me nervous.

Would it help you be comfortable if we like, planned what we were gonna do? Spontaneity is nice and all but if a script makes it more doable let's script it. At least to a point of like, hand stuff on you, then hand stuff on me, then mouth stuff on you, then fucking. Or whatever.

Okay, yeah, I just wouldn't want you to think that if I paused for a second or something it was because I didn't really want to be there, y'know? I wanna be there.

[ Because even discussing "mouth stuff" gives her a little thrill. Not the time, thrill! Jesus*! She's trying to focus!

Fuck, she's thirsty.

All right, it's fine, it's fine, she's a woman with needs, it's fine, she'll jack off about it later. ]

I don't know if it'd help, but I don't suppose it could hurt. Battle plans are nice.

I'm -- I should say, though, I'm still -- I'm still figuring out where I land on kissing. And I know that's. A thing.

[ *whoever that is ]

No, little nerves I can handle. I mean, it's the line between nerves and outright fear, you know? Which isn't always a clear line so it's hard to say what's going to be too much to deal with.

Kissing is a thing. I dunno, it's one factor among a lot of them. If you decide you're comfortable with it, or at least want to try it, I'd be honored by the trust. If not, let's just not dwell on it, maybe?

Yeah, if you think that'll work.

[ She sounds a little dubious, but she'll roll with it. If she's asking him to believe her when she says she can handle fucking without panicking, she's going to have to believe him when he says he can handle fucking without kissing. ]

There's probably lots of positions we could do that would, y'know. Reduce the temptation.

I just -- have a lot of teeth, man.

Edited 2020-01-24 17:03 (UTC)

The teeth are zero percent a problem. I've been bitten by worse, lady.

To be clear, I'm not promising I'll be perfectly fine about it. It's more that I don't know how much of an issue it's gonna be, but I'm confident I can handle it one time without, I dunno, freaking out.

[ Wryly amused: ] Boy, this plan has a lot of [ shrug noise -- "iunno" ] in it.

I mean, I'm more than happy talking you off at two in the morning.

Although, come to think of it, let's leave the Daddy stuff out in person, just to start. [She doesn't have to know how unsure he constantly is, trying to be in charge, when it's just his voice in the tome. He's pretty good at faking it with just words, but in person it's too much to handle, especially with all the existing unsteadiness she just referred to.]

[ Immediately: ] Oh, absolutely. You can bounce me on your dick without all the frills.

I'm okay with playing some of it by ear. Feels right at home.

Good. Yeah, I mean, probably best to leave room to improvise the specifics, I just think it's good if we both know, broadly, what to expect, you know?